Stinkin’ Thinking is Just like Drinkin’ Until I’m Stinkin’

Back when I drank, the truth is the first few drinks all went swimmingly.  If you loved drinking, you know what I'm talking about.  You sit down and crack that drink, and you're off to the races. The first few are relaxing and then the warm buzz hits.  All is well you think until all of a sudden you wake up the next day wondering what happened?  It was going so well. These days in sobriety I have the same phenomenon with stinkin' thinkin'.  The fact is I'm addicted to thought-patterns, … [Read more...]

Are You Past or Future Oriented?

I am without a doubt, I'm a future oriented person.  This is neither better or worse than a past-oriented person. What's the difference? I'm concerned and imagining the future.  You probably gather this reading this blog.  I talk about building a life and moving forward.  It's how I think.  This is good because I'm a doer and want to build things.  It's bad because I can lapse into worry. A past oriented person ponders the past.  The benefit is here is learning from the past.  This too … [Read more...]

Don’t Let 12 Step Perfection Be the Enemy of Doing the 12 Steps

I love the quote "perfection is the enemy of the good."  I believe it stems from Voltaire's "the better is the enemy of the good." (source Wikipedia). How often do we procrastinate or avoid doing something for fear of failing perfection?  Almost always good is good enough and is better than nothing. This is particularly apt to doing the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.  When I first read the 12 steps, I didn't think I needed to do them.  I didn't see how they would help. Once I was … [Read more...]

Sobriety Is Not About How Many Years You Have

Sometimes I think A.A. places too much emphasis on sobriety birthdays and especially the number of years people are sober. I understand the importance of acknowledging sobriety duration.  It inspires, motivates, and is a testament that people can get and stay sober.  It's also wonderful being celebrated.  These are all wonderful attributes of the A.A. birthday. However, sobriety duration does not equate to sobriety quality.  This should not be overlooked. There is no magic duration for … [Read more...]

Was I Insane?

Step 2 of the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous presumes I admit I was insane where it says "restore us to sanity." Was I insane?  Yes I was.  I drank almost every day.  I drank myself into blackouts.  I was insane. In fact, even in early sobriety I was insane.  I was an emotional wreck.  I was plagued with a cycle of self-pity focused thoughts. My entire life was doing the same junk over and over expecting different results.  By junk I mean actions, behaviours, and thought … [Read more...]

Why I Became a Health Nut In Early Sobriety?

I became obsessed with health and diet for 2 years.  I became vegan.  I'm not saying being vegan is bad; what I'm saying is the obsession simply wasn't good for me. I read dozens, perhaps hundreds of books on health.  It became debilitating.  So many diet theories promoted, I wasn't sure I could eat anything without being dead in a week. As an "all or nothing" type person, especially when drinking and in early sobriety, I figured if I'm not going to drink, I might as well become super … [Read more...]

Is Meditation Good for Sobriety?

Step 11 suggests meditation. I scoffed early on about meditating.  I wasn't having any of it. Then I met a young guy my age who had zen sobriety - he had terrific sobriety and hadn't been sober that long. I was still struggling.  We became and are great friends.  He introduced me to a meditation practice, which is part of my life now. In my usual fashion, once interested in something, I researched it to death before just doing it.  Of course I became confused in no time.  There were … [Read more...]

Is Zen Sobriety Achieved in a Day?

Yes and no. Yes, in living one day at a time is fundamental to recovering alcoholics and addicts. No, in the sense that for some people in recovery, serenity doesn't arrive immediately (it didn't for me).  If it does for you, you're fortunate.  I suffered well into being sober. The key to zen sobriety is faith.  And this, for me, is where A.A. meetings helped a lot.  I attended meetings where I met people with happy lives.  They laughed.  They loved their families.  They were engaged.  … [Read more...]

Zen Sobriety is a State of Being

Zen sobriety and serene living isn't the result of achieving X.  It's a state of being.  In fact, it's the state of doing something you love.  It's loving what you're doing.  It's being passionate. Easier said than done. The what you do is much less important than whether you love what you do. Sure, life is filled with obligations and duties we're not crazy about.  But, getting to Zen Sobriety is having something of many things that give you passion.  And it doesn't have to be … [Read more...]

Alcoholism and Depression – I was Affected

When I first quit drinking (I quite twice, first for 3 years, and now I've been sober going on 8 years), I became an emotional wreck. When I was drinking, especially in high school and college, it was the greatest activity in the world (or so I thought). It also prevented me from dealing with anything real. I didn't stress out much at all. I just cared about drinking. Then I quit drinking and emotions hit me like a wrecking ball. I didn't know what to do. I slept a lot. I was … [Read more...]

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